what side of the dirt will you choose to be on?

Its funny how you can step away from something for so long and one day, the desire to go back to it flips like a switch. With me, that is how my love for writing goes. I used to only write about the moments that I felt sadness... It was my outlet. Then one day, I decided that I didn't want to be that person who only told their sob stories.. I want to write about the things that made my heart patter... the things that made me feel alive; that is where this blog came from.

It didn't take long for that desire to fade. Things quickly change, and life gets busy. I became too busy to pour my heart onto sheets of paper, and in that time of chaos, I lost sight of the person that I was striving to become.. even though I still don't know who that person is.

Over the past year, I have been on a journey; a journey to not just find myself, but to truly look deep within myself to feel what makes me happy. Each day is a new feeling. Each day is something different. Some days I wake up missing the person that used to warm the other side of the bed; other days I wake up grateful for my independence. I think a piece of me will always miss that; I will always long for the bond that I shared with that person. However, no one can say for sure what the future holds.

Today I woke up grateful to be alive. I woke up thinking about a saying that was shared with me recently, "any day on this side of the dirt, is a good day". I've loved that since I heard it because it brings to light the simplicity of its meaning. Sometimes we get so caught up in the chaos going on around us, that we forget how lucky we are to be in the midst of this chaos.

I've learned to be grateful for my struggles, because I'm alive and able to make mistakes and learn from them. I'm here on this earth, in this life, to learn all that I can, and to shed light and love into the live's of others. I"m not perfect, I've never expected to be. I've always just wanted to be happy and loved; and I've learned that I am blessed to feel both so deeply.

Today is a good day, tomorrow will be what I make it.